while googling just now i began typing my question and got as far as 'how to keep...' into the search engine before google gave me their top 10 suggestions. they were:
how to keep a man
how to keep a conversation going
how to keep score in bowling
how to keep an erection
how to keep apples from turning brown
how to keep an idiot busy
how to keep a girlfriend
how to keep your man
how to keep pipes from freezing
how to keep weed fresh
... none of which applied.